Monthly Archives: October 2016

Something Will Change When Get Married

The festivity of your wedding is over, and you begin the reality of starting your life with your husband. You start to adjust some things, such as sharing a home and a life with someone, and while you may find it inconvenient sometimes, you get on with it because you understand that with marriage comes new roles, new responsibilities, new priorities, and new dreams.

Since a marriage needs each person in the relationship to work together as a team, for the marriage and for the family as well, it is natural that you and your spouse change as you adjust and adapt. But where does the biggest change lie? Will marriage impact your lifestyles? We think so!

Life before marriage will totally different. You have plenty of time hanging out with your friends, even time for yourself. You can go wherever you want, you don’t have to figure out how to fit in the in-laws, you don’t have to adjust yourself on how to act based on your marital status. Things will already be different, even without the arrival of a baby. When you’re married, you’re someone’s spouse. When a baby comes, it’s a total game changer, and you’re suddenly someone’s parent. You got more tough responsibilities, and along with that, you have different vision of life that you really need to work it out.

When you used to spend your hard earned cash to support your lifestyle, you would most likely be unable to do that on account to having to support your lifestyle as a family. How you spend your money will also change after you’re married. Money won’t be an issue of his-and-hers anymore because yours and his will come together in one melting pot.

However, being married also brings with it some comforting lifestyle change because there is a new level of security and comfort that comes along with being married. You’d opt for a night in, to Netflix with your hubby and chill, instead of going out and partying until the wee hours of the morning. What you enjoy will be different now that you are not two, but one.

Once you’re married, you’re a team, which means it’s not about you anymore. Marriage is a transformation from “I” to “we”. Change is inevitable. It is natural and it needs to be embraced. It’s the way two persons in love come together as one. Will you be able to take on change? We absolutely believe so. But the question is actually, are you ready for the change?

How to Trust Him

Dear Bridestory, I’m in a serious relationship with a very special someone. We’re planning to get married and I know that my marriage is going to work if I’m able to trust my future husband. I want to trust him, but somehow I am harboring a feeling of insecurity about him. Maybe I am just paranoid, but how can I be sure that I can trust him? What are the signs?” –GirlWithTrustIssues

Dear GirlWithTrustIssues,

First of all, let’s be clear. Marriage is about commitment. And since it’s for the long term, it’s important to be married with someone you can trust. A relationship with a lack of trust is not going to be a very satisfying or fulfilling one and we’re glad that you’ve come to realize that, because unfortunately, some men can be trusted but some cannot.

Before you deciding to marry, please look for the signs that he is a trustworthy man. Learn to trust your gut. But in the case you’re doubting even that, please ask yourself these questions to help you think if he’s worthy of your trust:

1. Has he ever done anything to make you doubt his faithfulness to you? Signs of infidelity are actually recognizable. Open your eyes and see him for who he is. If he has done something that ignites your suspicions of being cheated, maybe you need to have a talk with him.

2. Does he always keep his words and promises? “A man is only as good as his words.” And a trustworthy man will always follow through on his words and promises.

3. Does he uphold the values he has in life and does his actions show good moral principles? The goodness of a man shows in his action, and action speaks louder than words. Find out if you can share and connect important beliefs and values with him.

4. Can everyone around him attest to his character? A man’s behavior is an indication of his character. If you can’t see clearly, you might want to see how other people sees him.

5. Does he consistently do the right things? Doing the right thing isn’t just a one off thing. Doing the right things molds the character of a person. And consistency is important.

Remember that trust is the bedrock of a marriage. Before you take the plunge, make sure that you can trust him. Look for the signs that he deserves your trust and then make the decision to trust him.

How If A Girl Ask A Guy Out First

When it comes to the rules of dating, sometimes it can be difficult to tell whether or not we as women are allowed to ask a guy out. Most of us have been conditioned into thinking that men should always make the first move. As ladies, we are often expected to be a bit more passive because if we initiate, then we would come across as being ‘too aggressive’ or ‘too easy to get’. However, it seems that nowadays times are changing and having a girl ask a guy out doesn’t seem to be such an odd thing anymore. For those of us who do want to make the first move but are afraid to or don’t know how, below are a few things to remember before we take the plunge.

1. Five out of 5 guys like it and want us to do it. While most men have been conditioned to always make the first move, some men find this to be extremely stressful. Some men are shyer or feel uncomfortable taking the risk of asking a girl out and because of this, they would actually appreciate taking the back seat once in a while. To them, it is in fact refreshing and a huge compliment to have a girl ask them out for a change.

2. Asking does not equal to us being “desperate”. We need to forget the negative attachment that goes with asking a guy out. Taking the initiative does not mean anything. It just means we know what we want and we are not ashamed to go get it. Any guy who makes us feel bad for making the first move is probably someone we would not want to be with anyway.

3. The more straightforward we are the better. Sometimes we think we need to drop lots of hints to show that we want to ask them out. However, the best approach is to just be very clear about it for example by saying, “Would you like to have coffee with me sometime?” Hints and signs will not get us anywhere with men.

4. It is not a big deal if he says “No”. Another thing we need to remember is that just because someone does not accept our invitation does not mean we should never ask a guy out again. This is the risk all of us have to take when we make the first move. Just because we may not be used to the ‘rejection’ does not mean we should not take the plunge.

5. Start off with a group date if we are too scared. If we are too scared to ask a guy out to a one-on-one date, then we could always ask him out on a group date to make it seem more casual and relaxed. Tell him that we have a get together with our friends and we would like them to join us if he could.

6. Ask a guy on a casual and fun date. While we may want a romantic date, most guys would simply appreciate a fun and casual date where the atmosphere isn’t too serious. It helps to ask him out to a concert (that he likes), watch a movie, and do some sports or a fun activity. The chiller the better.